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posted : Wednesday, 27 June 2012
title :
This is not a rant. I just need to get this off my chest. Its not that I see you that often. In fact, I haven't seen you properly in almost over a week so there's no way in hell I would want to be unhappy at you or be avoiding any conversation with you. I love you. I love you. I miss you and I hate that our time together is so short every time I send you home. What hurts even more is that our time is taken up my flustering over some ridiculous girl who is too insecure for her own good. Had we had more time, I wouldn't have minded working on this problem, but its so...I don't know if perhaps, perhaps I'm being selfish by wanting my own airtime, but this, its so long overdue, its been MONTHS, how can a simple misunderstanding not be solved in MONTHS? The misunderstanding is worse, even. I can't even stand hearing it. In the little time I have, all I keep hearing and what keeps going through my mind are "rumors sabrina and ming han are going out", "when ming han asked me to go out", "you texted him all day", "i don't see us ever being close again", maybe she thought that I like ming han, not the other way" god, its not that I don't trust her because if I don't then I wouldn't even allow her to meet him if she'd listen to me, but I do trust her, but I understand that if this Candy Winkeyes person did not die of insecurity, she might die of stress as well. How the hell did someone else's relationship problem get in the way of the precious time I have with her, what the HELL happened? Maybe I don't even want to know damn it. Its to the point where I can talk and be damn sure I'm talking to myself with no acknowledgement or anything, where I have to repeat myself, to have her tell me that she was hearing what I said, but her mind is somewhere else. I don't want to see her so stressed, my god, maybe it isn't her that should get out of his life, I should bloody be the one telling him (and her) to get out of HER life. and stay there. if I wanted to be freaking insecure I could be the one threatening him because he made my girlfriend text him the whole day while she's with me, how's that? grow up. get your facts right before you talk. then again, I'm here trying to get my facts right as well.
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